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Christian Network

The only way to effectively confront sin in others is to admit to them the sin we ourselves have been guilty of. People do not enjoy being lectured to by someone who sets themselves up as morally superior to them, but if the one doing the confronting first confesses to their own faults they may listen. This truth is crystallized in the words of our Lord about the log in our eyes versus the mote (or small particle) in another’s. It is very easy to find sin in others and ignore our own. Such is the nature of our pride.

Most of us have had the experience of being on the receiving end of a sermon in which the preacher exhorts his listeners to identify and repent of a particular sin. Often the speaker does not give any indication that the transgression in question is one that he or she also struggles with. The overall effect of such messages is to make the listener feel morally inferior to the speaker. However every so often I have heard a sermon in which the pastor/teacher confesses to personally fighting the same thing. When they are publicly honest in this way I immediately feel a respect for and identification with them that makes me more open to examining myself in the area in question. By confessing their own struggle with sin they gain the right to be truly heard. They have removed the log.

In God’s eyes the only person who is truly morally superior to everyone else is Jesus Christ. All others are self-deluded if they think otherwise. Yet often we succumb to the illusion of moral superiority. In addition we find another dark principle at work in our flesh. When we are losing the battle against a particular wrong in our own lives we can become that much more strident about attacking that wrong in the lives of others. During the 1980’s a certain American televangelist was known for the ferocity of his on-air attacks on the sexual immorality that was, and is, so rife in this country. Later it came out that the man was soliciting prostitutes. Such hypocrisy was a tool that Satan readily and effectively used to turn many Americans away from giving the claims of the Gospel a fair hearing.

It is not that confronting sin in another is inherently wrong. The Bible tells us that we are to do so for the benefit of both the individual and the church of which that individual is a part. But if that person detects the slightest trace of self-righteousness in the one doing the confronting the confrontation is likely to end in both anger and defiance on their part. Because of this the sin can be compounded and the condition of the person ends up being worse than had nothing been said at all. Thus God’s loving redemptive purposes are thwarted, at least for the moment, and that is a terrible thing.

Humble self-examination is the only way to prevent these tendencies from destroying what might be a legitimate God-given opportunity to turn another from their sin. We must be open to confessing before confronting. Sometimes the best way to start such a conversation is to immediately admit that we are no better than the other person in the particular area of sin or, alternatively, in some other kind of sin that we have recently been guilty of. This usually disarms the defensiveness that is so often the product of an exhortation that is without humility on the part of the one doing the exhorting.

Love alone must ultimately be what compels us to confront evil in others. Part of loving someone is identifying with them. In admitting we are not qualified to be anyone else’s judge we love the person in question and we earn the right to be heard. Then the Spirit can move and blessed repentance can become a reality for them, and us.