When Doing Good Doesn’t Feel Good
Copyright 2005 by Shea Oakley
All rights reserved
"A tree cannot taste its own fruit."
-Wayne Scott Farley
There are times in the Christian life when we are called to bless others whether we feel like it or not. Sometimes the actual giving of the blessing is enough to engage our feelings in a positive way. However other times we feel no better after giving of our self. Occasionally we may even feel worse.
Nowhere in the Bible does God promise His children that doing good will always feel good. Perhaps the ultimate example is the cross of Christ itself. Jesus did not enjoy the cross; He endured it. The Son of God supremely blessed the human race in providing us with the way of salvation, but I think it is safe to say that our Lord did not have a "warm fuzzy" as He hung upon the tree. Undoubtedly Jesus foresaw "the joy set before Him", and this helped Him to bear the horrific experience of Good Friday, yet what He felt in the actual giving of Himself was unspeakable torment.
Our own blessing of others often requires us to carry a cross. It may be the cross of helping someone we do not particularly like or it might be the cross of giving to others what we feel we do not have enough of ourselves. Sometimes we wrongly fear that our motives are too mixed so we do not allow ourselves to know the joy of the blessing. Whatever the cross the result is that we do not take pleasure in giving what we give.
In more than one place the Bible refers to us as trees. A good Christian is like a healthy tree whose branches produce much good fruit. If we are abiding in Christ then He is the motive power for our fruitfulness. In daily life this fruitfulness is manifested in how we physically, psychologically, or spiritually help others. Again, however, the Bible does not indicate that we will always get some kind of emotional charge out of this. We may indeed feel better after blessing others but it is not something we can or should always count on. In fact to do a good deed purely for the chance to feel good renders the deed selfish. Such "giving" is not a true fruit of the Spirit.
That said we must remember that some true giving to those in need will not feel good or even real. Self-judgment in this area is tricky because often we do not know ourselves enough to come to an accurate conclusion about motives. Perhaps only our Lord can ultimately perceive if our fruit is authentic or false. At the very least only He can know all of the time. The bottom line is that, as Farley tells us, "A tree cannot taste its own fruit." It may be that some of us will be in for a surprise when, after a lifetime of agonizing over whether our giving was sincere, we get to Heaven and receive a "well-done" that we did not think we deserved.
In that spirit let us remember, and close, with what the Apostle Paul tells us Galatians 6: 9-10:
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people…"