Coming Out
‘L’ is a dear cyber-pal of mine; he is British in his eighty first year, and lives with his partner in Spain. I first met ‘L’ on a couple of Christian forums on which I post. I was struck by his erudite posts, compassion and sensitivity. ‘L’ has a great sense of humour and often teases me unmercifully on-line, as I do him, in the spirit of friendship and fun. We started e-mailing each other a couple of times a week, and a month or two back he shared his life story with me. I was not entirely surprised when he confided to me that he was gay. Most women are good at picking up the nuances that indicate that a man might be gay. In my experience gay men seem to be just a little more sensitive and empathetic than their straight counterparts!
‘L’ was born in an era when homosexual love dared not speak its name. I gather he tried so hard to fit in, and deny his sexuality, that he even became engaged. ‘L’ was unable to go through with the marriage, fortunately the girl understood, and even all these years later is a good friend of his. Not all were so compassionate and the opprobrium ‘L’ encountered was one of the reasons why he went from being a devout ’born again’ Christian to the atheist he is today, which is sad!
Gay bashing is almost a sport on many Christian Forums, there seem to be more threads on homosexuality on these sites than on any other topic! Some self-righteous bigots seem to think be a homosexual is the worst sin anyone can commit! ‘L’ ‘came out’ recently on the forums on which we post. Once he dropped the bombshell he sat back and waited for the reaction! Like myself, many of the women had already guessed, but the chaps took a while to recover! ‘L’ is very popular on the forum and once the initial shock had died down there were some who expressed their dismay, and one man even declared that it was sad a nice guy like him would be burning in the flames of hell!
I do not condone promiscuous behaviour, gay or straight, the physical, emotional and spiritual damage is great. However, I am of the opinion that one cannot help one’s sexuality and it would seem grossly unfair if one couldn’t have a loving relationship, just because one happens to fall in love with someone of the same sex. I think gays who are in a committed relationship should be accepted by society. I have heard horrific tales of Christian gays who have been condemned and cast out of their churches by their bigoted brethren. The Bible is one of the biggest weapons in the gay basher’s armoury. However, Jesus never once condemned homosexuality; I suspect if it had been such a terrible sin in his eyes he might have commented on it! I also think that Jesus would have been the first to stand beside a gay person who was being attacked because of their sexuality. I was once contacted by a gay American Christian man who was feeling suicidal because of the hateful attitude he had experienced from his family and church. He felt suicidal! Fortunately he was able to find a church who accepted him for the person he was, and looked beyond his sexuality. I was so moved by his story that I created the picture, ‘Trinity of Love’, which I dedicate to all gay Christians.
